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Your child will encounter more safety threats from bullies in their lifetime than other types predators as they grow up. Child safety means protection from bullies, too.
Bully intimidation is an unfortunate but real and pervasive element of our world. As your child grows, from elementary age into adolescence, the pressure from bullies increases.
Increases?!
Not only does the pressure increase, it takes on a whole new dynamic. For teenagers, bully intimidation adds a subtle element called peer pressure. Peer pressure, especially in these years, can be more intimidating than the threat of physically being injured by a bully.
Usually, by the time your child is a teenager they have developed a wariness of strangers.
The have a better understanding of physically how to keep a distance away from someone they don’t know or feel comfortable around.
Friends, on the other hand, are a different story. Pressure from a friend can be intense and intimidating.
Any time anyone, even a close friend, asks your child to do something your child doesn’t want to do, that is bullying. When the request is followed by intense and constant pressure to do it, we call it peer pressure.
Peer pressure, too, is a constant element of our world. It is how you teach your child to handle it that makes a difference, makes them safer as they grow up.
Step One: Communication
Teach your child to be able to keep themselves safe. At this age it means they can make good choices for themselves and choose what is right for them in the face of peer pressure. The key in doing this is communication between you and your child.
Communication is CRITICAL in being able to guide your teenager through peer pressure. Establishing a rapport with your child where they feel comfortable and confident in coming to you to discuss anything is the foundation for them being able to handle peer pressure.
Communication starts with your ability to LISTEN. Listening comes without interrupting or wild emotional outbursts at what your child is saying. It’s not easy. However, if you are not going to be their “go to” person they will find someone else and it may not be a positive influence or individual.
Step Two: What is Peer Pressure?
Get a clear understanding of what your child’s impression of what peer pressure and bully behavior is for them. It may not match your idea of it. You may think at older ages a bully is the big, hulking guy that physically pushes people around the school campus. In fact, the biggest bully may be your child’s closest friends. You need to find out from them what they think.
Close friends are most likely the ones that will be asking your child do things they don’t necessarily agree with or want to do. These suggestions and follow up pressures, in the form of constant verbal words and insinuations, make more of an impact on your child than a stranger or physically intimidating bully.
The better your child understands bully behavior and peer pressure, the better they can understand their own behavior and how they fit into the picture. It means they can make choices, good choices for themselves, when they find themselves in peer pressure situations.
It also arms your child with an awareness that will help them be less of an intimidator or bully themselves.
Step Three: Respect
As your teen develops this awareness, give them the freedom to make their own choices with your guidance. Follow it with an overt demonstration of your respect for their choices, even if you do not agree with them.
Without these most basic skills, no teen can successfully navigate the rough seas of peer pressure.
If some of this is already in place with you and your child, keep building on it and guiding your child into greater abilities to make good choices for themselves. If its not there, start today. No matter what age your child is you can begin today to build a rapport with them that will in the future, help them make good decisions for themselves.
Respect and communication are important life skills. Children who learn these skills early are more likely to excel later in life. They are also better prepared to withstand the negative peer pressures they will face.
Give your child a head start by enrolling them in a quality Martial Arts school. The programs offered at these schools build a strong foundation of respect and communication that your child will draw on throughout their life.
| Posted by Julie Graf, 11:17 AM, Permalink |  |
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